Absolutely Nothing
Hand-crafted nothing, made in small batches. Zero features, zero bugs. Science can't explain it.
NOW PLAYING
● LIVE
This man also has no idea.
NOTHING-AS-A-SERVICE · NaaS
I have no IDEA what I'm DEVELOPING!!!
Nobody knows why. There is no product. There never was. But the colours are incredible and you're already here, so stay a while.
Kick his ass
Kick his ass!
A man in a suit keeps asking "so what are you developing?". Click his behind as many times as you can in 30 seconds. He gets faster. He gets angrier.
Words from the void
CHEATER!
You are what you think you are
GIVE ME MY MONEY
Who am I?
I wish you were here
Who ate my sandwich?
Not again…
I SAW THAT
We need to talk
It's not you, it's the website
WHERE ARE MY KEYS
Call your mother
What we offer
One (1) Button
It's up there. It does something. We're not telling you what. Our lawyers say it's "fine".
Colours You Can Hear
That magenta? That's a trumpet. The lime is a kazoo. Please adjust your eyes accordingly.
Round-the-Clock Vibes
Our vibes team works in shifts. Currently on duty: a raccoon named Gerald.
Pick a plan, the price is rising
Starter Nothing
€9 / month
- 1 (one) empty feature
- Scroll up and down
- Email support (we read it, we cry)
Pro Nothing
€99 / month
- Everything in Starter, but bigger
- Unlimited confusion
- Gerald waves at you personally
- Price goes up every time you blink
Enterprise Nothing
€9,999 / minute
- A dedicated nobody
- 99.9% uptime of absolutely nothing
- Custom meetings about the meetings
Things said nearby
"I came here for a sandwich. I left with a new favourite colour."— a pigeon, allegedly
"My retinas filed a complaint. I have never felt more alive."— someone's left eye
"Five stars. I don't know what the stars are for."— Gerald (staff)
Frequently asked questions
What is this?
A landing page. You landed on it. It's working exactly as designed, which is concerning for everyone involved.
Why can't I click "Leave This Page"?
It's shy. Also, we've grown attached to you. Use the back button like a normal person if you must, but we'll know.
Are these colours safe?
They passed every test we ran, which was one test: Gerald looked at them and did not fall over.
Can I get a refund?
Yes. Absolutely. Your refund will be processed right after we figure out what we're developing. So… never.